Disillusion Medicine


Disillusion Medicine
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Awakening is like the Call of the Soul. It sounds lovely and romantic, but for a long time, this process for me was unpleasant, often accompanied by pain, and followed by great confusion and disillusionment.
In truth, I don’t think everyone has to greatly suffer to awaken, but when our consciousness is in deep slumber, something has to shake us awake.
During this process of disillusionment, we intentionally unhook from the beliefs, habits, and energies of people, places, things, and memories. This process can be slow, or it can feel like instant catharsis. This unhooking is a deeply powerful tool. I think we often go through it repeatedly in many areas of life because we are practicing the art of discernment.
Since we are all empaths, we knowingly and unknowingly pull in information from the time we are sentient (perhaps in-utero). As children and young adults, we are sponges, and so the art of discernment is required to distinguish between what may be ours and what isn’t; what is required in the present moment to come into alignment, and what hinders this; what is in love and truth and what is not; to name a few.
Once we hone this ability, we find the space within ourselves to make more conscious choices, not from judgment, but from a deep knowing of ourselves and what our Soul (or inner being) is calling us toward.
When I eventually realized that the world’s central banks and the Fed continue to overprint money and manipulate the financial markets in a desperate attempt to keep the control they have gotten used to, I felt I had to make a personal decision. I did not know what the decision was, but I felt sick to my stomach knowing that I unconsciously participate in this system of control and enslavement. It took me many months and a lot of asking questions and looking at how many feeding tubes I have directly from my wealth into these systems. Eventually, I decided to pull my decade-long accumulation of retirement savings out of the bank, convert it into physical precious metals, and store it at a local vault.
I’m no millionaire, but for me, this decision was massive and impacted my finance picture quite a bit. It took every ounce of courage I had to move through the fear and resistance of pulling out of the only system I had ever known and one that everyone else I knew was still plugged into. I would dread the idea of explaining this move to my family because I didn’t know anyone who did this.
This is why I think the disillusionment and the resulting confusion part of the journey is so essential to the awakening process.
The confusion here is noteworthy because it feels unsafe and disorienting to know something, to believe it, and to live as if it were the sole truth, only to find that that is no longer the case. We may find that we have several chords attaching us to what we believe or think we believed. A powerful medicine in moments like this is to drop into the heart and feel our way through this. Confusion isn’t a feeling; it is more so an occurrence when the mind is changing states. The feelings here may be fear, anger, betrayal, or shock. Underneath these feelings lie those beliefs that we once held as true. We become unsure of ourselves and can even go as far as doubting our abilities in other areas of life. These are all steps on the path. We are learning to trust ourselves and the process of awakening to truths – within and around. We are learning to feel, sense, and think our way altogether rather than functioning on autopilot based on the beliefs of others. We are learning from the best teacher there is – our life experience. The stability and confidence that comes from going through these deep dives into the Self is a far stronger foundation than what we had before.
So, as we walk on, we have not only gone through this confusing and difficult process and questioned the very ground we walk on, we also learn compassion and patience with ourselves.
As such, when we share our journey with others, we are often faced with their projections, illusions, and fears that we may trigger.
Once again, discernment serves us so well here because as we continue to walk our spiral paths, interwoven with one another, we can learn to tell the difference between the fears and triggers that are truly ours and those that belong to other people.
We cannot save anyone from their journey, nor can we change another with our words, but having gone through our full process, we can hold steadfast in our being, and that is the light and the possibility we offer others.
For now, we walk towards a prosperous world.

And this time, there is no illusion—only truth.


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